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Ranger175csar · Post by **Ranger175csar** » April 20th, 2006, 4:05 pm

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood

Chuck

I have a new TV show for ya Chuck..... Chuck Factor

Just think of the type of shit you could come up with for that show using the hidden talent on this site....

ChuckNorris · Post by **ChuckNorris** » April 20th, 2006, 4:44 pm

I'll talk to NBC, it sounds like a good premise...

Who knows, I'm good friends with the devil, maybe I can convince him to let me grab Bruce Lee for a guest appearence. Anyways once again I am waiting to get off work... hooah to platoon layouts... yay...

Jim Jones · Post by **Jim Jones** » April 20th, 2006, 4:55 pm

Chuck Norris defines love as the desire to not kill a person. If you are still alive, it is because Chuck Norris loves you.

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting because the word hunt infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

Chuck Norris can win a game of connect four in only 3 moves.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

By the way, are you the one who wrote all those facts on the mailroom board?

289sotherhalf · Post by **289sotherhalf** » April 20th, 2006, 6:13 pm

Welcome to the site.

Ciara · Post by **Ciara** » April 20th, 2006, 6:25 pm

When Chuck Norris' wife burned the turkey one thanksgiving, Chuck said, "don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."

Steadfast · Post by **Steadfast** » April 20th, 2006, 6:42 pm

WELCOME Ranger

Hey Chuck, howse about a coupon for a free Total Gym.

No shit Sherlock.

Gordo173 · Post by **Gordo173** » April 20th, 2006, 6:49 pm

Welcome Ranger

Ranger175csar · Post by **Ranger175csar** » April 20th, 2006, 10:04 pm

ChuckNorris wrote:I'll talk to NBC, it sounds like a good premise...

Who knows, I'm good friends with the devil, maybe I can convince him to let me grab Bruce Lee for a guest appearence. Anyways once again I am waiting to get off work... hooah to platoon layouts... yay...

Now Bruce Lee....... Thats the mother fuckler right there....hes the fucken Dali Lama, Buddah and all that is Holy....

MrsDocMac · Post by **MrsDocMac** » April 20th, 2006, 10:30 pm

Welcome Ranger!

centermass · Post by **centermass** » April 21st, 2006, 2:42 am

cams wrote:Welcome Ranger.

Chuck Norris doesn't need to be air dropped, he straps on an open chute and blows into it until he's over the DZ.

Cams,

You're fucking killing me..........welcome Ranger and thank you for your service.......to your country and NBC

Ndog275 · Post by **Ndog275** » April 21st, 2006, 7:24 am

I heard that Chuck Norris sold soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

FireFinder · Post by **FireFinder** » April 21st, 2006, 8:20 am

Welcome Ranger and thanks for your service.

ChuckNorris · Post by **ChuckNorris** » April 21st, 2006, 11:19 am

It is at out nightly poker games where I arranged for Bruces guest appearence lol. As for on the mailroom... Actually no, I know that the ChuckNorris shit was circulating but I think it found its way over from C Co when my team leader picked it up from a friend a couple of months ago. But it's all over the web man, that shit could have come from anywhere.

Re-enlisting 91W, San Antonio here I come...

Vee · Post by **Vee** » April 21st, 2006, 3:00 pm

Are you really the real for real Chuck Norris?

Cuz....I just can't believe Chuck would lower himself to hang with the likes of ordinary Rangers.

ChuckNorris · Post by **ChuckNorris** » April 21st, 2006, 4:54 pm

Normally I wouldn't stoop, but when the a certain government official caught me sleeping with his wife he decided to send the Regiment to handle Iraq and gave me the shaft. As I said, normally this would have been unacceptable, but since you all proved to be such bad mother fuckers

I decided to give you all a chance...

ArmyRanger.com

New to the site

...

ChuckNorris

Re: ...

Correct

Well...