How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?
Charismatic: Only one. Hands already in the air.
Pentecostals: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.
Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.
Baptists: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad.
Episcopalians: Three. One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old bulb was.
Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.
Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb.? However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.
Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church-wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.
Nazarene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.
Lutherans: None. Lutherans don't believe in change.
Amish: What's a light bulb?
How many Christians??
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- Tadpole
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Puritan/Calvinists-Designate village witch to hold said devilsh instrument
firmly while we light the kindling!
firmly while we light the kindling!
312th LRS 1st CAV 89-91
RS 12-91
RI 4RTB 92-94
H Co.121(ABN)(LRS)04-PRESENT
WTC PRC 05-06
OIF 06-07
WTC PRC 07-2010
TF Wolf MUTC 2010-
"The lapdance is always better when the stripper is crying"
The trouble with Scotland is it's full of Scots!
RS 12-91
RI 4RTB 92-94
H Co.121(ABN)(LRS)04-PRESENT
WTC PRC 05-06
OIF 06-07
WTC PRC 07-2010
TF Wolf MUTC 2010-
"The lapdance is always better when the stripper is crying"
The trouble with Scotland is it's full of Scots!