Ranger Poser?

Bell · Post by **Bell** » September 18th, 2003, 10:50 am

You read him right. No Ranger is bashful about his company, battalion, or Ranger School Date.

Fuck him. They're everywhere. You finally found one. Too bad it wasn't a real deal he'd been talking to. Then ya'd find out what a real Ranger does to other people when they go into assault mode. We don't just talk about it.

RLTW
Bell

Spartan · Post by **Spartan** » September 18th, 2003, 11:15 am

Yeah, like an urban ambush right in his face, where he sat, with no prior warning whatsoever.

Steadfast · Post by **Steadfast** » January 3rd, 2004, 5:29 pm

LN, I just read your post and I wanted to agree with you & add that we had a fellow of this build with us in basic training back in 1968. He was an over-bound muscle man. He also washed out of basic. The biggest difficulty these muscle guys have is the monkey bars & confidence course. These muscle guys can't seem to get their hands close enough together to use their hands one rung after another. This would start the DI's smoking this muscle guy and because they have such an ego about themselves it is more than they can stand & eventually they break down. Our muscle guy was bawling like a baby & within a day or two was gone from the training unit. He sounds like a classic case out of the past.

EggMcMuffin · Post by **EggMcMuffin** » January 6th, 2004, 9:35 pm

I never knew there were laws against being a poser.

Linkage.l

Horned Toad · Post by **Horned Toad** » January 6th, 2004, 9:53 pm

Desert Sloth could post a pretty funny story about fakers, I just remember getting a piece of paper in my mailbox at work with a photocopied scroll and some other patches on it that had been cut off this tools BDU shirt with the words I GOT HIM underneath in big letters

Slowpoke · Post by **Slowpoke** » January 7th, 2004, 8:41 am

LMFAO! Well done Ranger!

Saltbitch · Post by **Saltbitch** » January 7th, 2004, 4:10 pm

Holy shit! That kid definately had more balls than brains. Good story!

pjd · Post by **pjd** » January 8th, 2004, 1:52 am

Have a brief story to relate. It in no way compares to Desert Sloth's, but WTF, I'm bored...

Had been out of the Army for 2 or 3 years. Was back home in one of the local Irish pubs, throwing back some beers, wearing a grey t-shirt with a 1st Batt Scroll on the front. Shooting the shit with my buddy when I hear the distictive "ching-ching" of a brass coin hitting the bar. I didn't even have to look, we all know what that sound is. I turn and see the coin on the bar next to me, it had been tossed there by a grey haired man with a huge mustache, in his 50's (the man, not the mustache). The instigator tossed the coin at me from the far end of the bar - a good 12-15 feet. Fucked up thing is I had just mentioned to my buddy about how I didn't have my coin on me and I was a jackass for heading out with a Ranger t-shirt and no flippin coin. So, I buy the guy a beer, we get to shotting the shit, turns out he's a tabber Ranger, 2 tours in nam (68-69 I believe) and a well respected member of the community (Fire Chief). After a dozen more beers with the man, and a few shots of Jager, he's threatening to beat my door down every morning to get me out running with him. Fuck that, I dont do that shit anymore :)
Ok, to get to the relavent part of the story. I moved away not too long after that, but a story has reached me about this Nam Ranger that fits with this thread. Seems that soon after I moved, in the same bar, there was a fella about my age (mid 20s) running his mouth off about Ranger this and Ranger that. Now, this is a neighborhood pub, you either know everyone in there, or you know someone who does. No one knew this person, and he is pissing alot of people off, talking shit and the like. Well, our old friend that coined me walks in, catches wind of the youngin talking big and bad about a being a Ranger, and does the right thing - he coins him. The way it was described to me, the fella with the big mouth was like "yeah, whats this?" He had no idea what being coined was. So, Mustache Ranger starts grilling him with questions, none of whice are adequately answered. Then, without the slightest hint of what was about to happen, the Mustache Ranger, a man in his late 50's, pummels the loud mouthed wannabe's face with a closed fist. One hit, laid the punk out cold. A few of the guys in the bar drug him outside, his friend who was with his was "advised" to get the fuck out and that he and his unconscious friend were not welcome back. I just wish I had been there - not to kick the poser's ass, but to watch a man twice his age knock himout with one punch! Ahhh... Makes me feel good just thinking about it.

Sidenote: I have never left home without my coin since that day and have used it many many times since. Just a couple days ago actually. Talking to a bartender, turns out he's an old 3rd Batter from the mid-90s, he says "I'd coin your ass but I dont have it on me." I replied "Well, I guess I'll have to coin your ass then." Nothing like a round on the house :)

Slowpoke · Post by **Slowpoke** » January 8th, 2004, 8:53 am

pjd,
I don't know why, but for some reason that story really made me feal good. Thanks.

Rgr_MindRiot · Post by **Rgr_MindRiot** » January 8th, 2004, 9:52 am

Hey Slowpoke,

You sportin a big mustache ?

Slowpoke · Post by **Slowpoke** » January 8th, 2004, 11:18 am

Rgr_Mindriot wrote:Hey Slowpoke,

You sportin a big mustache ?

And a beard...see the "Picture Post" thread in the DEP Commo Zone....wish it had been me.
The closest I've ever come to busting someone was a guy I worked with. He claimed to have been with L/75, 101stLRP as a 1Lt. Some of the things he was saying didn't sound quite right, but I just wrote it off as they must have operated differently than we did. After he transferred to another plant (in North Carolina), I joined the 75th RRA. I'd always had this suspicion about him, so I decided to check him out with the guys who were in L/75. Within 24hrs I got 18 e-mails from guys who had been there at the time he claimed to, all saying he was full of shit. I e-mailed this poser several times, trying to get him to come to the Ranger Rendezvous last Aug. at Benning, but he claimed he couldn't get the time off from work. I'm a very patient man...I will get the chance, some day, to bust him face to face...or in the face

Saltbitch · Post by **Saltbitch** » January 8th, 2004, 12:45 pm

pjd-
Do you happen to recall the guy's name (bartender)? Just curious.